Saturday, 21 July 2018

On Holiday with the Maybot


Philip: Tea or coffee?
Maybot: I've been very clear I have ruled nothing in or out at this point in time.
Philip: How about some jam on your toast?
Maybot: As I have repeatedly said, our precious union leads the world in fruit preserves of all kinds. That is not going to change. 

An Alpine hike

Philip: Fabulous view!
Maybot: We are aware of all the environmental factors and will deal with them in due course.
Philip: Is that a kestrel?
Maybot: The careless slaughter of animals is an issue I am well aware of and will be legislated for as we leave the EU. Freedom of movement for predatory species will have to end.

A Day at the Races

Phil the Greek: Who the fuck are you?
Maybot: We are creating a hostile environment for anyone who cannot provide papers, documents and signed affidavits proving they have right to live in the UK.  
Phil the Greek: Call your henchmen off, I'm the fucking Duke of Edinburgh!
Maybot: All appeals will be heard through the normal channels. 

Watching the Telly

Philip: Stand a bit closer to the set, luv, the picture's getting clearer.
Maybot: I have been clear ...I have been clearer...
Philip: Oh shit, the signal's interfering with your circuits.
Maybot: Strong and stable...I have been clear...we are leaving the Customs Union...

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